It pays to not pay attention...

So this is my first blog...as if you haven't figure it out already. So you can't complain about it anymore WENDY! Oh, where to begin...if I take you back and ramble about all the things in my life I have had to deal with or encounter, you would most likely never want to read my blog again either that or feel so much better about your own life, you would call a physciatric ward on me. So we will just start with my weekend for now. Friday I of course went to work and arrived fashionably late as I usually do. My boss probably tends to think this is not considered a time to be fashionable but you can't please everyone. MDPREPS are now all mine, since Wendy left dust marks on her old desk...goodie for me! A little insight at my job...Anesthesia Services...we do medical billing and deal with a lot of B.S. not only from outside of the building of people calling in rambling about how they got hurt, needed to go to hospital, and now cannot pay their bills...my response...Who is the doctor?...their response...How the hell should I know? It makes the day go by wonderful and fast, let me tell ya. But me amoungst several other people deal with peoples B.S. inside the office. Working with 30 other women was not exactly my dream job but for me, my dreams usually dont come true. Friday night lasted until 4 in the morning for me, planning my friends bacholerette party and got an unexpected phone call...maybe I will tell details on that later. Saturday had the party and didn't go to well as hoped but after forking at another $50 bucks for my friends wedding dreams..small price to pay to have some fun with your friends. Sunday was a lazy pointless day...I tend to sleep way more than I probably should..due to an "x" amount of reasons that I wont bore you with. Here's a theory or my personal one I should say...resisting temptation is one of the hardest things a normal human being can do. But for one particular person this comes very easy with me. A little embarrassing yes. Feeling unattractive to someone is mostly likely the most embarrassing of all. And then dissapointment sets in. Funny way of how your mind plays tricks on you. I would explain all this but I think Vince Vaughn does a much better job in wedding crashers...this is going to be a long one so watch out...

"Janice, I apologize to you if I don't seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call dating. I don't like the feeling. You're sitting there, you're wondering do I have food on my face, am I eating, am I talking too much, are they talking enough, am I interested I'm not really interested, should I play like I'm interested but I'm not that interested but I think she might be interested but do I want to be interested but now she's not interested? So all of the sudden I'm getting, I'm starting to get interested... And when am I supposed to kiss her? Do I have to wait for the door cause then it's awkward, it's like well goodnight. Do you do like that ass-out hug? Where you like, you hug each other like this and your ass sticks out cause you're trying not to get too close or do you just go right in and kiss them on the lips or don't kiss them at all? It's very difficult trying to read the situation. And all the while you're just really wondering are we gonna get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions? Perhaps play a little game called "just the tip". Just for a second, just to see how it feels. Or, ouch, ouch you're on my hair. "

....Perfect explanation of how Sunday night was. I think I lost him for good but I think what I'm trying to say and the motto of it all is...If I stop caring so much, then I wont get hurt.